Saturday, June 13, 2009

Adult Friend Finder Find Me a Friend (with a Big Cock)

It’s Saturday night and I’m writing a post.  That can mean only one thing, Wife’s out on our date alone with Mr. D?  No, it means that Mr. D couldn’t make it tonight.  But he and Wife talked on the phone for the first time this week.  She liked it.  We might meet next Wednesday evening.

Since I’m not out meeting the man attached to the next cock to be in my wife, I thought I would torture you with a long boring post about AFF.  I gave you my first impressions nearly 2 months ago.  Since then I have learned a lot about AFF.

When you first register for AFF you select your gender, what you are looking for, your location, a valid email address, and your choice of user names (something like ImTheQuietMan.  You may have to try a few cause your first choice, say QuietMan, might already been taken.)  That gets you to a second screen of questions.  You select from a list of choices for things like your sexual orientation, height, smoking, etc.  You can upload a photo if you wish.  At the bottom of the page you will find the most difficult question, “Tell others about yourself”.  After this you will receive an email with the password.

Get your password and login.  You go to the Order page.  You can sign up for a silver or gold membership at this time (but see later why to wait).  You are now a standard member (Doesn’t that sound like it translates to average dick?).  Near the top of the page are menus for Home, Mailbox, Account, Search/Browse, Friends, My Lists, Chat, Get Local, Video, Blogs, Groups, and Shop.  Look around and see what you like.  I must admit it took me a long time to find my way around.  And I still haven’t tried all the features available to standard members.

At this point you won’t be able to do some things until your profile is approved.  I think they mainly check to see that you haven’t done anything illegal or posted contact info.  It shouldn’t be long though.  They say it can take up to 48 hours, but both accounts that I have set up were approved in about 2.

Here’s some of what you can do.

•    On the left side shows the number of messages, flirts, points, referrals (not sure what this is), new matches, views of your profile, and friends.  Click on any of them to go to a page with details.
•    You’ll probably notice the center section first, cause it’s got lots of naked people (It was weeks before I realized there was anything else on the page, lol).  Not sure why this is here, because they are from anywhere in the world, and usually nowhere near you.  Still you can’t help but look at them and mouse over the little i for a bit of info.
•    Click on the Online Matches at the top (or Our New Matches on the left) and if you’re like me, you’ll find a lot of guys in Dodge have limp dicks.  These are a few of the people near you that you might be interested in.  You can change your cupid settings so the default search is more to your liking and also to filter you incoming mail.

•    The mailbox shows you the number of unread messages in the menu bar
•    You will have an email from the system.  READ IT.  It gives you good information about being successful using the site.  Save it and read it again later.  It apparently has a link to a benefits page that lists what you get for as an average dick, silver dick or gold dick.  That’s the one thing I’ve bitched the most about, and fuck if they didn’t tell me on the first day.  Typical man, never reads the instructions.

Account: where you can update your profile and change account settings.

Search/Browse:  duh, but limited for standard members

Friends: You can collect friends.  What good is that?  As far as I can tell, you get to see their private photos.

My Lists:  here you can get lots of good info on whose viewed you, flirted with you, and hotlisted you, as well as who you have flirted with and hotlisted.

Chat:  haven’t used

Get Local:  use this to find out about places and events near you.  This is based on your IP location, not the place you might have picked as your location when you signed up, say Dodge City.  But you can change it to anywhere.

Video: check out member’s webcams.  Only one can be open at a time for standard members.  I watched a woman cuckold her husband with their friend one night.  That was really cool.  Another time I found a woman in Spain showing off to just 2 people.  When I joined, her robe closed quickly (but not quick enough) and she then went private.

Blogs, Groups, and Shop:  haven’t used them (why bother, my blog’s not on there!)

What I like:
•    This site it made for everyone.  No matter what gets you up, they got it.  (Unless you’re into something illegal.  In which case, you’re on your own, buddy.)
•    You can sign up as a male, a female, a couple (man and woman, 2 women, or 2 men), a group, or a TS/TV/TG
•    There are lots of people on here.  We’ve had contact with men, women and couples.  Most from our area, but some from around the world.
•   If you are popular, you can view profiles as a standard member.
•    Mailbox shows how many unread messages you have in the menu bar
•    After a few days, we got a discount on upgrading.  First it was 10% for about a week.  Then it went to 20% for about 2 weeks.  Finally it went to 40% for less than a week.  By then, I was busy and missed the chance.  After, it returned to 20%, then 10%.  Now it is full price again.  We’re still happy as standard members, so no need to pay just yet.
•    LOTS of good stuff.  Profiles, chat, webcams, local info, flirts and more
•    Anyone can flirt with anyone
•    Email By name who has sent you a message in AFF
•    Emails showing which members have put you on their flirted with, hotlisted, and viewed you
•    Emails showing new members and matches in your area
•    Upload a voice greeting and send voice messages
•   Post photos, standard members can only see a thumbnail of the main photo.  Others can see more (silver limited to 5 and to approximately 3x2” area, gold can see all full size).  There is one woman who rotates her pics every few days so we can see them all.  You can also upload private photos for your friends network to see.
•   You can hide your profile
•   You can set up an auto response to incoming emails

Additional services available for a fee:
•    Always be able to view profiles
•    Keep emails longer (60 or 120 days)
•    View photos in profiles (up to 5 per profile for silver, unlimited for gold)
•    Advanced search
•    View members’ videos
•    Priority placement in profile lists, search results, etc
•    Telephone tech support

What I don’t like:
•    Haven’t found a way to change the password from the random characters the registration process creates to something I can remember.
•    Sometimes when you leave a webcam, you can’t open another right away.  You have to wait up to 2 minutes for it to realize you have closed that window.  Othertimes it works fine.
•    Hard to find your way around.  I’ve been using it for 2 months and still have a hard time ;) finding everything.
•    Your emails are somehow screened.  I think it is electronically looking for certain words.  We had a guy (Mr. A) send us his profile name with another site name.  His email was caught and we got a message saying he sent something inappropriate.  You can’t give out contact info for the first 2 messages.  We’ve seen people put things like contact me at xxx on the why in other screened fields.
•    There is no “I’m not interested in you, loser!” flirt
•    It keeps your profile forever.  We saw the old one we abandoned 3 years ago.  We no longer have the email account associated with it so we can’t log in.
•    If you hide your profile, no one can contact you, even those you have been emailing aready.

What I don’t know:
•    How you become popular.  Is it based on the number of emails you receive?  That might explain why we can sometimes see profiles and sometimes not.  Although there seems to have been a widespread problem with viewing profiles in early May.
•    What are referrals?

Overall, I like Adult Friend Finder.  We have met some good and some not so good guys on this site.  The site is definitely there to make money, which I don’t have a problem with.  We will probably sign up someday (if Mr. D isn’t enough).  The site is horrible to navigate.  There are many screens with similar info, and finding the one you saw last time is frustrating.  On top of that, sometimes we are popular and have extra privileges and sometimes we are not.  There is no way to tell.  That’s not true.  You can see if you can view others profiles.  If not, you’re not.  But we didn’t know about the extra privileges for a long time and couldn’t understand why we could view things one day and not the next.

There are a lot of active people on this site.  So much so, we had to put a message on our profile telling people that we we’re looking right now.  That slowed down the messages and flirts, but didn’t stop them.  Wife wants to wait until we meet with Mr. D before we open it up again.

I do recommend Adult Friend Finder.  I think it is good for a quick hook up and for finding a long term relationship.  It all depends on who you meet, just like anywhere.  Only on AFF you know a bit about what each is looking for first.


Sexy at Forty said...

So, that's not bad at all, the stuff you cab do with standard account.. It's free correct? I signed up a few weeks ago - but I deleted my account like 2 hours later because it was too damn confusing! (& I am a computer geek! lol)
My bf signed us up at swinglifestyle, but I have not even gone there to check it out. I told him to handle the account - that way if he finds a hot guy or something I am really surprised! lol.

Quiet Man said...

Sexy at Forty - I agree, AFF can be frustrating. It is free for standard members. For gold and silver members the price ranges from $4.50 to $26.99 a month depending on how many months you sign up for, what the discount is, and if you pick silver or gold.

We haven't tried swinglifestyle yet. Maybe we'll try it, but AFF and Ashley Madison are keeping us busy.

chocdrop said...

I liked AFF when I was using it. It was confusing and lots of the same info over and over. But I had good success.

Wildhog said...

QM, I just discovered your blog and find it interesting. I don't think you state how many men your wife had experience with before you. Were you her first or did she have much previous experience. If so, do you have any interesting experiences to relate to set the scene for your current efforts?

Quiet Man said...

ChocDrop - I agree with the confusing part. The day after I published this post, I was able to view profiles again. I really can't figure out what qualifies as popular. No luck yet with the success part.

Wildhog - That is a topic on which I planned to devote at least one post. Our history is long and has a few good twists. Here I'll say just that she did not have much experience prior to meeting me.